Ruth Institute Blog

(January 28, 2014) Betsy Kerekes is Drew Mariani’s guest on his eponymous show, where they discussed marriage–how to have a better one, Ruth’s recent publication “101 Tips for a Happier Marriage,” and related questions. Order the book on Amazon, or check out the store at our website–it makes a great wedding gift.

Oh, and the conference Drew and Betsy mentioned? It’s called “Healing the 21st Century Family.” One day in Carlsbad, California, full of encouragement, healing, and inspiration–and not a polar vortex in sight. Check out our website for the details.

One of the most common things I see in regards to the marriage debate has to do with love. Here are a couple common misconceptions I have seen across the internet.

“When a gay couple marries, it is exactly the same as when a heterosexual couple marries. In other words, they are in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together.”

The relationship between the two couples is not the same. Since sexual activity is a huge component of marriage, the two types of marriages are not identical. Read more…

by Catherine Palmer

John Blake’s recent CCN article, “Why Young Christians Aren’t Waiting Anymore,” sparked a flurry of thousands of responses. Released in September 2011, the piece cited an article in Relevant magazine entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” exploring the sexual activity of Christian singles. But one finding, in particular, stood out from the miscellany: According to a December 2009 study by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, 80% of evangelical young adults (18 to 29) reported having had sex—just under the 88% statistic of unmarried adults overall. “Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait, including the saturation of sex in popular culture, the prevalence of pornography and a popular ‘do what feels good philosophy,’” Blake writes. But are these listed sociocultural factors solely to blame? Or is there a concomitant reality at play here? Read more…

Here’s a good article filled with advice for older women to meet a husband.

Seeing as how I’m quickly approaching forty, and I can see fifty coming over the horizon, I evaluated the advice given in this article with one question in mind: would this work on me if I were single and approached by the woman who posed the question?

My conclusion:  it’s the best advice that can be offered for the question that was asked.

by Jennifer Roback Morse

Part 1 of 2

Dr. Morse gave this speech April 23, 2011, at Hong Kong Baptist University, at a conference of Western and Chinese scholars, entitled “The Family and Sexual Ethics: Christian Foundations and Public Values.” China is experiencing numerous problems due to family breakdown, including the one child policy, high divorce rates, and an imbalanced sex ratio. This conference was convened because many in China, even in the Academy of Science and in government,  are interested in what Christianity has to say about marriage, family, sexuality and society.  The conference papers will be translated into Chinese and published in book form.

Read more…

By Pat Hagan

It’s a bit of a cliche that women settle down for love, and men for regular sex.

But scientists are claiming it’s true. A study shows that women agree to cohabit because they view it as a stepping stone to marriage.

Yet men move in hoping for more sex and to ‘test drive’ the relationship to see if it is worth sticking around. Read more…

[This one was my personal favorite.]

The New York Times description of their contest:

Three years ago we invited college students to tell us the truth about what love was like for them in this age of 24/7 communication, blurred gender roles and new attitudes about sex and dating. The response, from students at more than 365 colleges and universities nationwide, was overwhelming and eye opening.

So we’re asking again. If you have a personal story that illustrates the current state of love and relationships, e-mail it to us at . The winning author will receive $1,000 and his or her essay will be published in a special “Modern Love” column on May 1, 2011, and on nytimes.com.

The deadline is March 31st. We encourage young adults to:

a.       Enter the contest with a good, pro-marriage, pro-authentic love story. Send your entry to us as well. We cannot promise you coverage like the NY Times! But, we will happily consider publishing worthy entries on the Ruth Institute site, even if the Times doesn’t give you a prize.

b.      Write a blog post, critiquing the past winners, who can be found here.  Again, we will be glad to consider these posts for our site. I am frankly suspicious that out of all the entries they received, they couldn’t find anything remotely pro-marriage. As one of my colleagues put it to me, “I read two of the essays from last time and they are just…tragic.”  The Love and Fidelity Network is already all over this contest! And I do hope you all will get involved with this.

Send your entries and your critiques of past winners to